Loving yourself - what does this mean? How to love yourself - tips psychologist

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2018-04-08 07:00:44

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Often In life there are moments when individuals begin to torment any remorse, guilt or he reproaches himself for any particular action-word that begins a moral rot and planting. The origins of this negative attitude can begin with certain situational circumstances, and may be rooted in deep childhood. Particularly advanced cases often end in depression and psychological stagnation, so it is quite important in this case to understand how to love themselves and how to begin the process of learning self-respect and self-love.

But how to get out of this state? How to love yourself? The psychology of the present time helps to solve the problem from the standpoint of the analysis of the situation in all aspects of its possible manifestations, that is, approaches the issue comprehensively. Because it is impossible to eliminate human disease, based on the three failure mechanisms in the body, bringing health, only one of them. Therefore, in order to figure out how to love yourself and increase self-esteem, you must perform a number of the recommendations of the experts involved in analytical work on themselves and their own “I”. That offer psychologists, and what items should be taken based?

Disappointment in myself

Recognition as a full-fledged personality

Love yourself – what it means in General as requiring compulsory execution of the verdict? After all, it is necessary to perceive the necessity of bringing their thoughts and feelings in order to harmonize the rest of their lives without samopoczucia and self-loathing. To love yourself, you need at least to recognize themselves as individual personality is formed, a full-fledged unit of society, part of society. People who are looking for the flaws in yourself and believe your own worthless existence known to go astray. Humiliating themselves, their human qualities, playing down their abilities, they thereby put themselves in a dead-end state from which it is quite difficult to get out.

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How to cope with this disorder and be aware of their personal integrity?

  • To Determine for themselves their self-sufficiency. Does not matter, whether a person has a significant other or not – it is already an integral unit of society. It does not matter if he has expensive cars – people cannot be measured only by material goods. Love yourself for really no reason at all, because love, finances and things like that come and go, but belonging to the society remains a constant factor.
  • Objectively evaluate their activities. Regularly not looking for a trick and try to discover in their actions negative. For each incorrect action you have to undertake proper and deliberate step, life is not made up only of collecting their own punctures.
  • Make yourself in fact, received more than a gift, in the form of material with which to work, and not useless like a bad fake to throw the villain destiny. The people themselves are rulers of their own destinies, the sculptors of his body and blacksmiths of his own happiness, therefore, only hard work to achieve success, and self-criticism, and lowering of the hands doesn't help their self-realization in this difficult world.
    the Man is the sculptor of his body

Ability to work on their weaknesses and failures

How to love yourself and increase self-esteem, if you own the problem seems to be deeply personal and virtually unsolvable? Because different people make different mistakes and have different opinions of their actions.

For Example, how to love yourself woman, who considers herself a poor loser because of their external unattractiveness? It is deeply convinced that nobody will ever love, and because of this belief, she begins to hate herself.

And how to love yourself teen who regularly experiences such as being teased at school because of some stupid youthful stupidity, as is often the case in educational institutions in the relationship between students? Provocations by the other guys are depressing and brainwashed the minds of fallen under the hand of the guy and provoke him to hard self-examination, self-criticism, self-loathing and, as a consequence, his dislike to himself.

the Process of self-flagellation

It is Necessary, first, to learn to work on their imperfections:

  • Being disappointed with their appearance, try to do the maximum in order to fix it rather than sit idly by and lament over excessive weight, for example, instead of having to go to the gym and give there full;
  • Being dissatisfied with their social position, to strive for the best: to take up self-learning, self-development, to improve their level of intelligence working on your thoughts with the scientific and journalistic literature, and do not husk the seeds of the evening and night on a neighbor's bench;
  • With a claim to his own person in terms of the manifestation of weak character, to go against their modesty and the lack of initiative and to work against the will and the power of thought, to go to the club of martial arts where they teachto raise healthy body, healthy mind, sign up for yoga classes where state of mind is balanced by physical strength.

Focus on your own score, and not on others

It's hard Enough to manage to overcome the dislike of his own person and love yourself, putting someone on a pedestal of respect and honor and leaving themselves in opposition to his idol on the opposite side of the scale. Why not praise someone? Why can't you like someone to follow his example, focusing on other people's results? How to love yourself?

Psychology interprets comparing myself to others as a manifestation of human weakness, caused by a constant feeling of nesamodostatochnosti and inferiority. The fact that mania of following someone or something found quite often. Men, for example, suffer from this in terms of professionalism and career advancement. A simple example: a colleague at work goes on the last stamp machine of last year, becoming the Deputy Director with successfully delivered project, this means (thinking men) that need to systematise to the Director-General and to fill his own projects like his lucky counterpart to achieve the same result, and also to ride in expensive cars, not the warping of daily transitions in the subway and complain about their poor fate.

Psychologists are his recommendations a little adjusting behavioral methods and subconscious motives thinking so men: you need not chase success colleagues, need to work on yourself, on your professional work to manifest itself in another area, to show their strengths, in any case, not focusing on others and trying their own minds, their own ideas to achieve the cherished result. After all, in the pursuit of compared with someone will never become better than someone. You should try to become better today than you were yesterday.

The same thing in women's world the desire to be prettier, cuter, sexier than my girlfriend. How to love yourself a woman that only does what it is fighting with his girlfriend in the eternal pursuit of men's attention, trying to buy a dress is better than hers, to make your hairstyle more beautiful than a friend, to pick up makeup so well and even better… in short, it initially failed the behavioral model.

People don't have to compare yourself with other units of society, they should be focused exclusively on the result, work out daily their own mistakes and try to be day-to-day to better yourself, not someone.

Comparing yourself with others

Work on the body and thoughts

Only through hard work and strong commitment can achieve some result and understand how to love yourself. Exercises recommended for study by psychologists, I propose in this key to pay attention to the following aspects of operation:

  • Determine the root of your problem not being able to accept yourself as such.
  • To Perform its attitude to this issue from the position of why can't this problem be overcome.
  • Get a list of theses, which can obstruct understanding how to love myself the way I am and try to act on the contrary.

In Other words, the science of human thinking is a person to program your brain to eliminate their problems, looking deeply into its original sources.

For example, one sees the root of your problem in your excess weight and can not make himself so fat that he is. So, you want to analyze this problem from the standpoint of what prevents a person with this problem? In the end, when he lists the aspects that do not allow him to lose weight, it is banal human laziness, love of excessive consumed high carbohydrate food and a complete lack of physical activity.

This means that in order to love yourself, this person needs to act on the reverse and rebuild their thinking, starting from the opposites: you do not love yourself, because it is thick – go to the gym, you do not love your marbling on the sides – stop using the dirtiest and the transition to proper nutrition, make it your mission – and just come to her.

Fighting flaws in appearance

The same with ideas: if the problem is not in appearance, but in the subconscious, we have to determine the root cause of dislike to him and try to lose those negative aspects of their thinking obstacles to love yourself.

The Desire for change for the better

To stop samoraneniya and self-torture, it is necessary to strive for the best. How to do it?

  • Must be able to think positively – with pure mind and thoughts, man is freed from fears and feelings of insecurity.
  • You Must get rid of the negative – the entire emotional burden of negative energy that prevents us from moving forward and strive for the best.
  • You want to develop your logical and mental ability – it certainly leads to productive outcome of the work on yourself and your shortcomings.
  • Should work on a method of programming yourself for success – betting on successful completion of their activities (work, study,any other field of activity), it is possible to achieve and prove to yourself your importance that will surely help you to love yourself.

The Lessons are conducted on yourself, always give generous fruits of the work performed, if this really is a large commitment and result-orientation.

Visiting psychologist

Definition of personal principles

Surprisingly, it is often unprincipled spineless people suffer from a dislike of the private “I”. How to learn your own self esteem, if in life there is no priority of belief?

  • Do Not tolerate cheating – I make it a principle not to associate with liars.
  • Don't like being told what to do – put pointing to the place.
  • Don't want to do, as all – develop your own tactics.
  • Do Not tolerate human arrogance – I make it a principle to prevent landing on the neck of people on the vine.

Oddly enough, defending their own beliefs through the bewilderment unconsciously makes others respect for the man, who has his own point of view and their opinion about a particular issue. And the respect of others necessarily entails respect for himself.

Promoting your own good deeds and good deals

If people used to blame themselves for unrealistic expectations, wrong actions performed, unfulfilled dreams, then you need to be able to praise himself if it all works out. Method “carrot and stick” - a well-known catalyst effects on anyone. Also in work: how to love yourself and be confident person?

The Answer is simple: learn to respect ourselves for our own small victories. What sums up the need for sampoorna? If after each successful transaction or donation benefits to society to reward yourself with a brownie or some kind of pleasantness, can be clipped in your consciousness the understanding of the fact that produced any positive action is bearing fruit. This kind of incentive again and again to vary in a favorable successful stock.

The Suppression of self-pity and self-flagellation termination

In order to stop your own attack of hatred and self-pity, it is necessary to develop in his subconscious technique of overcoming adversity and achieving success, fueled by affirmations. How to love yourself using these affirmations themselves? This type of statements, or phrases that represent encouragement motives and embodying the focus in a positive way for a change of mood for the better, really helps to regain self-esteem. How to stop self-pity and self-flagellation to stop using these phrases? You need to talk out loud or to yourself every convenient to do this a second time:

  • “I am quite a normal person, I have no reason to feel sorry for myself”.
  • “I accept myself as I am”.
  • “I should not blame yourself for your faults”.
  • “I do work on my mistakes” and the like samarbejde speech.

It May sound strange but this technique really works.

Affirmations out loud in front of a mirror

Implement their own positive qualities

To Help to destroy their impulses to self-loathing helps to work with your subconscious mind and their positive human qualities. Writing on a piece of paper its really positive side, you have to put them into practice, adding to the reputation of their good deeds, along with the fact that you have not love.

Thus, you can objectively put it on the scales of their misdeeds and their successful business and balance thus created his own suspiciousness imbalance in feelings toward yourself.

Dedication and achievement of objectives

The Most important tool for solving problems relating to fault-finding for his “I” pricks of conscience and guilt, is to switch your consciousness to the setting specific tasks and goals. The desire for a better, permanent employment due to the necessity of development of concrete action, and raising to the heights, make a person grow, develop, and less time to devote to the process of self-flagellation. After a long journey from the painful thoughts to take decisive action, the man finally begins to feel their importance, to attempt to become better, to focus on results. Because of this he reaches his goal and begins to love himself for what he is.


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Alin Trodden - author of the article, editor
"Hi, I'm Alin Trodden. I write texts, read books, and look for impressions. And I'm not bad at telling you about it. I am always happy to participate in interesting projects."

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